Monday, May 29, 2017

May 29 Thought for the day...being a parent can make things apparent



I am a people watcher by nature. Those of you that know me may find it interesting to know that I am at heart an introvert and shy. I enjoy watching people's reactions but watching someone's children often reveals far more than most people want you to know.

"one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence" 1 Timothy 3:4

Paul is talking about the qualities of a leader. The best way to interpret this passage and the reflective one in Titus is that every man of God should do these things. Then from that group, choose quality leaders. Paul takes special note to the reflection the children have on their parents.

I once asked one of my teachers, in the public school for over 30 years “What can you tell about a family by the way a child behaves in school?” She answered, “Everything! I can usually tell by the way a child acts if his or her home is peaceful or tormented; if the parents pay attention to their kids or ignore them; and if the father and mother have a good relationship. Almost everything can be determined by watching a child’s behavior. It’s usually a mirror of what’s happening at home.”

The word used here to describe "children" is referencing to children that are under the guidance and tutelage of their parents. Once a child has grown to become an adult, the parents are no longer responsible, but until that time the parents are responsible for the child's actions and speech.

I want to especially challenge men here, because Paul is, that we must accept the responsibility for our children. Our actions as leaders in the household set the tone. Men tend to pass off the nurturing and care of the children to their wives but especially in this day and age of Fatherlessness. I want to encourage men to be Jesus in their homes so the children will reflect Him too!

The word translated "reverence" refers to a person who carries themselves with dignity and treats others with honor and respect. What I am about to say is not 100% accurate but it is at least 95% there are always exceptions. If I see children always bickering, disrespecting one another, treating each other with little value or care on a constant basis. I know that the home is the same. Children mimic the life of the home, and by watching children, I can better understand the home life and the life of the parents. Children will fight and bicker it is in their nature, but it is not natural to be in a constant state.

Likewise, if children are disrespectful of leadership and lack a servants heart, I can guarantee that this is the revelation of the household. I have been disappointed at some who have worn the mask of servant leadership in the church building, yet their children revealed the truth of what home was really like.

Thank the Lord the opposite is true as well. Respectful children, kind children, children full of love and hope tend to come from homes filled with the same. I know some parents are feeling guilty but listen, any child can turn south after they leave home. Some children are simply problem children. Today's blog is not to make people feel guilty but to notice the signs of your household. You may not even notice your arguing, fighting, gossiping, disrespectful behavior but your children are reflecting it. Take it to the Lord. Thank Him for the acknowledgment of the problem. Ask Him how to fix it and begin to enjoy a life with your children where they truly love you and the Lord.

God never points out a problem to hurt us only to help. Your parenting may be more apparent than you know! If your kids reflect Jesus, they are reflecting Him because they are reflecting you!






No comments: